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Getting To Know One Another

Tue, 29 Nov 2022 18:30:00 GMT

Learning How To Court and Date

It's very important that we teach our children how to court and date. And it's also very important that we teach our children and young adults how to select potential mates. Too many of us keep doing the same thing over and over expecting that the next generation will be any different. And because we don’t change, our children's mate selection doesn't improve. We have to understand that we are the model from which our children will replicate (good or bad).

In other words, our children attract who they are. So if we want our children to attract a person who is loving, responsible, mature, self-sufficient, nurturing, and loyal, we must Show & Tell! We have to stop developing immature, irresponsible, dependent young people and expect them to attract a person who is everything that I've listed in the previous sentence. Now this is not to suggest your child will not attract someone who is fundamentally opposite of him/her; however, those folks usually don’t stay. Mature and stable people usually don't stay with immature and unstable people.

We must teach our youth and young adults how to listen and receive wise council. Too many of them don’t get the 'soul food' needed to assist them make sound decisions that will lead to a great outcome. Too often, it goes in one ear and out the other because they don’t respect the person giving the advice. Or maybe it’s because of how the advice is given. Or maybe there aren't enough wise elders in our children's lives. Wisdom (in terms of relationships) come from age and experience. This is why in some indigenous societies, children are trained up by the elders in the community.

Every potential mate of your child should be 'interviewed' by elders in the family (men and women). Now when I say elder, I’m talking about someone who’s over a certain age, has a certain amount of life experiences and possess a high moral code of living. And their thoughts should be heavily considered in the decision to enter into a serious relationship. This maybe an unpopular opinion; however, there are too many children born into dysfunctional and unstable environments.

We should encourage our children to become mature and stable before entering a serious relationship. Too often, many of us entered into serious relationships before we were mature and stable human beings. Thus, many of us entered into 'situations' where abuse and neglect happened. And sadly, many of us bore children into these volatile environments. We must make a concerted effort to break this cycle.

Too many young adults are making the same mistakes that their parents have made regarding relationships. This is having devastating effect on our family structure and our communities.

Sickest Time in America?

Tue, 01 Nov 2022 13:35:00 GMT

What is the Sickest Time in America?

What's the sickest time in America? Between Halloween and New Year's Day. Why? Due to holidays and the mass marketing of processed foods, sugar consumption, and alcohol consumption, millions of people will get the 'flu' n other illnesses/diseases making the medical industry billions of dollars.

This week alone, millions of children will take 'over the counter' medicine, check into emergency rooms and not attend school due to the over consumption of 'sweets'. We are setting our children for a lifetime of sugar addiction which will lead to diseases (diabetes, nerve damage, heart, etc) and dental issues (root canals, fillings, cavities, etc). Read the book, Sugar Blues.

Corporations have done a masterful job tying in certain 'foods' with holidays. Halloween is tied with candy. Thanksgiving is tied to Turkey, processed foods, cakes, pies and alcohol. Christmas is tied to the same toxins as Thanksgiving and certain corporations (toys, games, clothes, shoes, etc.). And of course, New Years is tied to an increased consumption of alcohol.

Until we take more time to think about behaviors that we engage and make some fundamental changes, we will continue become sick and develop life threatening diseases. In fact, it's safe to say that our children will not grow old if they continue to follow our lifestyle (death style).

Outside of CoVid, Look at the rates of heart disease, cancer, high blood pressure, diabetes, liver disease, and strokes within our community. Now, if it's bad now and we are the examples from which our children are following, imagine what the rates will be they are 40 (if they are fortunate to live that long).

The sad fact is that more of us will bury our children, not from homicides, but because of 'chewicide'. We are literally eating ourselves to death and teaching our children to do the same.

The main cause of illness and death is what we consume.

Now, everything I state could be wrong, but you will not know until you do some research and critical thinking. But what if I am right? What are we prepared to do about prolonging our lives and our children's? Or are we just going to leave our health and bad habits in the hands of the 'Lord' (as if God help those who don't do anything to help themselves).

'Let thy food be thy medicine and thy medicine be thy food.'

Resources - 'Living Superfood Longevity' & 'Epidemic' by Keidi Awadu; Documentary - 'Sugar; The Bitter Truth' (University of California Television); Ted-Ed's 'How Sugar Affects the Brain' - Nicole Avena

The Age of the Enabler

Mon, 04 Apr 2022 19:29:00 GMT

Crippling the Development of Our Children

One of the most disturbing trends in many of our households is the role of the enabler. An enabler is defined as one who enables or encourages another to persist in self-destructive behavior (i.e. substance abuse, irresponsibility) (definition - Oxford Languages).

An enabler is a person who prevents the full maturation of another person (most likely a child, sibling, spouse, or another family member).

The enabler also provides excuses for his/her 'grown' dependency and assists the individual to avoid the consequences of such behavior. Enabler provides excuses such as 'I can't kick my baby out in the street'.

One translation could be 'I don't have the confidence in my child/spouse/family member to make it without me.' Another translation could be 'I don't have a life of my own so I will fully immerse myself into my child's life.'

Most enablers will defend their perspective as to why they should continue to act in such a destructive fashion and will most likely never stop being enablers.

An enabler can be a mom, dad, grand mom, aunt, uncle, or sibling. But from my experience, most of the enablers are women (mom/grand mom) due to the fact that so many guys (Fathers) in our families are M.I.A. (Missing In Action) which is another conversation altogether. Also, enablers think that by enforcing 'tough love', the child will love them less.

They also think that being tough on their child will make them a 'bad' parent, which is kind of ironic since what they are currently doing is not working. I find that most enablers are suffering from some emotional dysfunction, which came from previous experiences (childhood or failed relationships) and cope with that hurt or pain by overcompensating for their dependents.

Another example of an enabler within our families is grandparents rearing grandchildren. Oftentimes, because the enabler didn't do a good job rearing his/her child to become a responsible adult, the grandparent feels an obligation to rear their children’s children.

Keep in mind, that in most cases, there's nothing physically wrong with his or her child yet the grandparent doesn’t believe that his/her child will fulfill the role of being a parent. Instead of doing the logical thing by making their child become the parent, they cop out.

Another factor in the decision to rear grandchildren is the guilt that many elders feel of not rearing their children to become a responsible adult.

The dependent (the recipient of the enabler) most likely will never see how they are being handicapped by their enabler and will think that suggesting that they should 'grow up' is an insane notion.

Some will engage in cursing and/or fighting for their 'life line'. The dependent makes excuses as well such as, 'I'm going through some things and I need time to get it together', even though they are not paying bills or contributing to those who struggle to pay for them and their children.

The sad commentary in all of this is that the majority of our families consist of several enablers and this is one of the reasons why we have so many grown males/females who can't seem to 'get it together'. And what many enablers are unwilling to admit is that one day they will transition this life (i.e. 'Upper Room') and will leave a legacy of chaos and family dysfunction. All the dependent will do is find another enabler and/or go into a deep depression.

We are in a state of emergency and losing too many Black males to violence, incarceration, life of immaturity, life of unproductiveness and drug abuse.

We must collectively step up our efforts to develop strong men who can provide for themselves, their families and their community. But in order for this to occur, we need more parents to take an honest look in the mirror and stop crippling their sons. We need more parents to ask for help when they don’t have the answers, closed mouths don’t get fed. If we are honest, many of us desperately need professional counseling and lack the parental skills to be effective.

We need more family members and friends to step up their efforts in assisting each other. We need to be honest with our loved ones and friends. It truly takes a village to raise a child.

My wife always says that we live longer as adults than we live as children. Yet, we perform poorly training our children to become responsible adults. Too often, we allow our children to spend hours upon hours 'playing' yet spend very little time engaging in developing productive social, life and academic skills necessary to compete in today's society.

The #1 job of a parent is to rear productive men and women who can stand on their own two feet. Parents' jobs are to produce future moms and dads who can provide/nurture for their own children; produce men and women who can excel in their careers and professions; and to produce men and women who can maintain healthy relationships with others.

We must do whatever it takes to stop crippling our sons/grandsons and equip them with all the tools needed to be competitive and productive men who will FIGHT for their right to exist on this planet. Otherwise, the future looks very dim for our children and their children.'

The older your child gets, the more he/she needs PARENTING.

Tue, 13 Oct 2020 13:45:00 GMT

Parents!!

Just because your child is a teenager and approaching young adulthood doesn't mean that you stop parenting and allow your child to make life decisions that could hurt his/her long term success. It's ok that we step in and make hard decisions for our children (whether they agree with it or not). Now, I'm not saying that you can't have a conversation with your child regarding your decision, but the decision still should be made by YOU. Parenting is not just about providing, protecting, and disciplining. It's also about providing guidance and making decisions that maybe unpopular to the child.

Case in point, almost a year ago, I had a conversation with a parent who wanted me to help his child improve their ACT score. Now, I really don't mind assisting anyone; however, the problem lies that the child is in his senior year and has plans to attend a 4 yr university next fall. And the parent is asking right before the child's last semester in high school.

As we peel back the layers of what's really going on, the child took the ACT twice (score low on both attempts) and never had any prep classes nor developed a strategy to improve his/her scores. Also, I find out that this child (like so many others) spent all of his/her extra time engaged in various sports. Now, I don't believe that students shouldn't be engaged in extracurricular activities, but the priority has to be toward a child's academic and professional development. And oftentimes, parents don't step in to make the difficult decision to focus more on his/her child's academic success especially if the child wants to attend college.

Now, I don't fault parents for not understanding the importance of prepping their children for college because many just don't know nor understand the process. My parents (like many others) didn't know nor understand the college prep process and left me to make decisions that should've been handled by adults. This is one of my motivating factors as to why UUNIK Academy provides ACT/College prep sessions.

(Back to the story) As the parent and I continued to engage, I hear a common theme that I've heard with many other parents, 'I've talked to him/her of what he/she needs to do'. While I am in favor of allowing your child to make certain daily decisions in his/her life, I believe that the parent has to step in and make hard decisions that can positively impact his/her child's life longterm. Also, as parents, we have to understand that our teenagers are STILL children, not adults. If our children are planning to go to college, we must put them in great situations to excel academically 1st and hold them accountable. This also includes discipline if the agreement is broken. When I say discipline, I mean withholding extracurricular activities as well as losing privileges (i.e. cell phone). Discipline can also result in extra household chores or volunteering to help a neighbor or two.

The parent and I talked for almost an hour when he/she finally realized that he/she should have stepped in and decided that his/her child will sacrifice extracurricular activities to improve his ACT scores. Parents, the temporary displeasure that your child feels when you remove something he loves doing will not compare to the life long heartache of not reaching his full educational potential. We have too many examples of grown adults who didn't reached their full academic and professional potential because of decisions that were made for them as children.

As we get older as human beings, we need guidance and leadership from those who have already traveled the path that we've yet entered. This is especially true for teenagers and young adults. Too many of our teenaged youth are mentally and emotionally immature to make decisions that will impact them for the rest of our lives. Another sad fact is that some of us as parents are in the same 'mental' and 'emotional' boat as their children.

The moral of the story is that if we want a better world and existence for our children, we must be the 'light house' for their daily behavior and decision making. Oftentimes, we have to be the 'bad cop' and make difficult decisions that will position our children in a better place.

Reggie Jenkins, executive director of UUNIK Academy, info@uunikacademy.org

These are the Things to Change boys to Men....

Mon, 11 May 2020 13:56:00 GMT

I'm pretty sure that many of you are familiar with the blog title, especially if you became of age in the 80s and 90s. Well, this post isn't about one of my favorite R&B groups of all time, New Edition, but rather my passion in assisting our community develop more of male children into responsible and productive men. In 2022, there will be too many male children who grow up to become dependent males who heavily rely on a parent or a significant other for their well being. Too many grown males are going to their graves, never discovering how to be a grown man who can provide for themselves and their loved ones. This sad reality must change if we are going to change the trajectory of our male children and grandchildren.

Parents, one of the main things that your male child needs (besides love) is DISCIPLINE. Discipline is about teaching your child a system of values and morals that they can use to guide through their adult lives. As parents, we are in the business of rearing a MAN and men need discipline. Discipline to do what needs to be done when they don't feel like doing it. Discipline to complete the task after the FIRST request, not the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th. Discipline is having the courage to avoid dangerous situations (not following the crowd) that will arise during their lifetime.

In order to train your son to be disciplined, you must 1st discipline yourself. We must take the time to ensure that our children follow directions and not allow our children to make decisions on their own. More of us need to make our children the PRIORITY regardless of our busy schedules. Also, we must practice effective communication skills and stop YELLING at our children when correcting them. A more concerted effort to communicate our messages without traumatizing our children is a must. This is very difficult for those of us who have experienced 'whippings' or another form of corporate punishment. People tend to do what they have been through or experienced. Thus, as parents, we will have to reprogram our idea of discipline and create an alternative system of discipline that promotes healthy behavior for our children. Now, I am not implying that we stop enforcing rules that our children violate. I'm just encouraging that we find more effective ways of getting our messages across.

We need to stop lecturing our children and 'encourage' them to complete the task requested. Develop a routine of consequences when your child doesn't follow the rules set forth. It can be in the form of giving them a timeout and taking away their favorite toys or privileges (playing video games, cell phone, extracurricular activity, etc.) for an extended period of time. Regardless of what our form of discipline is, we must be consistent in order for it to have a long lasting impact. This is a problem for many parents who don't want to be viewed as a 'bad' parent and don't want to implement any form of discipline due to their traumatic childhood experiences. This is not healthy and can lead to a lifetime of problems for all parties involved. Today, far too many children are running the households that they reside in. And too many parents make excuse after excuse for their children's misbehavior and 'tantrums'. The truth is that most (if not all) children crave discipline and boundaries. Unfortunately, a lot of parents

don't share the same sentiment.

Far too often, parents are negotiating and pleading for their children to do what is asked. In my opinion, I am not going to negotiate for my son to clean his room, bathe daily, brush his teeth, perform his chores, etc. Now we can have conversations once the task is complete. For Black males, discipline is mandatory for our collective survival. If we don't teach and enforce a system of discipline within our households, an external source (law enforcement, the streets or school system) will enforce their 'idea' of discipline and oftentimes, their system of discipline can lead to a worse situation (incarceration, abuse or death) than what we would implement.

If you are a parent of a black male child who doesn't have a man role model, I will encourage you to do all that you can to find a MAN or group of MEN to assist you to do the job that you can't perform. If there's no men in your immediate circle, look outside of your sphere of influence and seek help. You have uncles, granddads, men in church, men at your jobs, men in your neighborhoods, etc. I would also encourage you to insist that those men you associate help you or DISASSOCIATE yourself from them. Growing up without a father can lead to destructive behaviors that many of our children do not recover from in their lifetime. Behaviors and conditions such as depression, low self esteem, drug addiction, violence, and incarceration are oftentimes associated with lack of fatherhood or male nurturing as well as childhood trauma.

Another point, our black male youth don't need spoilage, they need LOVE. Spoilage and Love are two distinct things. Spoilage is rewarding bad behavior with gifts, freedoms, and privileges. Spoilage is really about doing anything and everything to stay in the 'good graces' of our children. It speaks to our emotional insecurities and immaturity as parents. Love is nurturing and affectionate. But love can come in the form of discipline as well. Love can be a parent being stern with his/her child and being consistent until the behavior is corrected. Love is making your child EARN his privileges back when he breaks your rules. And I don't mean within a few hours or a day after his violations. Love is disciplining your child when you are TIRED AS HELL yet you KNOW that this MUST be DONE. Love is reminding him who pays the mortgage/rent, telephone bill, purchasing the food, and healing him when he's sick.

Spoilage is overcompensating because his dad isn't around by buying him EVERYTHING. This is setting him up for failure and a lifetime of dependency on others. Love is understanding that he doesn't have an active dad yet it is NO EXCUSE for him not excelling in academics and developing life skills. Love is teaching him how to be responsible, respectful, hard working and motivated. Love is teaching him that life can be cruel and painful yet he MUST persevere and EXCEL! Failure is NOT an Option!! And if you don't think you have the tools to teach this, FIND A PROGRAM THAT WILL DO THIS!!

Spoilage is allowing a GROWN A.... Male to live in your house and not contribute to its upkeep and well being. A parent who spoils his/her child will eventually say 'I can't kick my baby out in the streets'. Love is giving your grown male a timeline and a deadline for getting his act together. Love is following through with your timeline and deadline. Love is MAKING your grown male child to contribute to this household or KICK HIS A... OUT!!

We have too many Black males (and a growing number of females) who are not growing up developing discipline and maturity. And until we as parents/grandparents/uncles/aunts change our mindset and get control of our emotional dysfunctions or insecurities, more and more black males will be destined to FAILURE. Too many folks think that this is a single parent household issue, it is not. There are too many males who come from 2 parent households who are just as dysfunctional as those who come from 1 parent household. This is a collective problem for Black people no matter the social-economic status. It's time to put our BIG BOY DRAWS or a BIG GIRL DRAWS on and BE parents!! Again, if you need help ASK!! Closed mouths don't get fed.

Tips to Keep Your Child Academically Engaged

Tue, 05 May 2020 14:07:00 GMT

During this extended time off for students in the United States, many parents are scrambling to keep their young ones pre-occupied. Sure, the easy route is to allow your child to watch TV or play video games all day, but how constructive will that be to allow them to spend countless hours gaming and not engaging their 'gray' matter in academic development? Excessive use of these options can lead to the stagnation of our children's academic and personal development. It can also start (or continue) a dangerous trend where our children lack confidence in their ability to master educational subjects and become another statistic in the American public school system.

Studies show that young children should not play video games no more than one hour per week. We must also be cautious as to what type of games our children play, due to the fact that some of the most popular games are violent in nature. TV also play a significant role in our children's academic, personal development (or lack thereof). Studies also show that watching TV for hours daily can have a negative effect on a child's development. We must be diligent in filling our children's day with mental stimulation activities.

As parents and guardians, we must develop daily routines and rituals that helps our students development, academically as well as socially. Too many of our children lack the fundamental, academic skills to compete in today's everchanging economy. Thus, when they have a tremendous amount of time on their hands, it's imperative that we create environments and routines to keep them engaged.

The following are a few suggestions that Mr. Devante Sales (New ID Tutorial Services) and I developed to keep children engaged and mentally sharp during this 'corona vacation':

1. Provide structure to your supplementary education.

a. Develop a daily routine for your children and stick to it (be consistent). In order for this to work, we must be consistent with our schedule. Now, of course, life happens so be a little flexible. You may have a minor emergency come up during day (ex. car repair). You can reschedule learning time later in the afternoon.

b. Ensure that you get at least 2 to 3 hours each day of academic learning.

Ex. 10 am to 12 noon & 2 pm to 3 pm; or 9 am to 11:30 am & 1:30 pm to 2:30 pm

c. Teach in 30 to 45 minute increments. Rotate subjects during those allotted time slots. Also, incorporate breaks in between session. Ex. 9 am to 9:30 am - Reading;

9:30 to 10 am - writing; 15 to 20 minute break (snack and recreation);

10:20 am to 11:00 am - Math;

11:00 am to 11:30 am History/Science/Georgraphy;

11:30 am to 12:30 pm - Lunch and free time;

12:30 pm to 1 pm - creative learning (puzzles, board games, checkers, etc.)

1 pm to 1:30 pm - Review of morning materials/Spelling/journal writing.

d. Stick to the fundamentals of learning - Reading/Phonics, writing, math (addition & subtraction), spelling and language arts. Now, if you child has mastered the fundamentals, you can implement additional subjects (i.e. social studies, history, essay writing, science labs, music).

2. Find a grade level assessment for your child. Assessments are a great way to find out where your child is in various subjects and gives you a guide to know where to start in terms of teaching.

a. For example, if your child is in the 3rd grade, google math assessments, reading assessments and phonic assessments. (i.e. websites, K5 Learning website & Math Mammoth have assessments)

b. Don't worry about the source of the assessment, focus on the concepts that your child is unable to do independently.

3. Use any educational, professional resources and organizations that are available - UUNIK Academy, New ID Tutorial Services, local churches, and afterschool organizations. We can assist you to develop a daily curriculum or can provide additional resources to help your children.

4. Ensure that your child is very fluent in addition, subtraction, multiplication and division (3rd graders and older). There's an epidemic of students are not fluent in these math skills, including middle and high school. You can use flash cards, games, and websites (i.e. xtramath.org, quizlet.com, worksheetfun.com)

5. Be creative when teaching.

a. Find creative ways to teach subjects. Incorporate visual and audio resources when instructing. For instance, you can use coins to learn how to count money as well as skip count by 5, 10 and 25. When learning parts of speech, you have your child name 10 nouns in your house. You can also have them display 10 verbs. Use puzzles, boardgames, card games apps, scrabble pieces (spelling words), chess, dominoes, etc.

6. Teach your children about money and personal finance. Too many youth are growing up without the knowledge and understanding of how to count coins and dollars.

a. Purchase books that deal financial literacy. Have your child read and write a book report or perform an oral presentation.

b. Play Monopoly and Success (jaz-ehousegames.com) board game with your children often.

c. Have your child learn how to count using pennies and skip count (count in multiples of 5s, 10s, 25s) using coins. Once they have mastered them, mix up the coins and have him/her add several coins up.

d. Sit down with your children and show them your monthly budget (if you have one). Show them how much you have to pay each month and allow them to add up all the household bills. Then give the monthly salary that you (and your spouse) earn each

7. Take time to teach certain life skills.

a. Teach your children how to prepare a meal (Breakfast, lunch and dinner).

b. Teach them how to perform household chores (washing, iron clothes, sweep, mop, clean the bathrooms, vacuum the carpet, wash the car, and wash dishes).

c. Teach them how to speak socially, how to greet people, shake hands, how to ask questions, how to resolve conflict, and to speak in public.

d. Teach them how to balance a checkbook, to write a check, how to change a flat tire, check the engine oil, and how-to-grocery shop).

8. Stick to the fundamentals. Be consistent, repetition is the mother/father of learning. Remember, you don't have to teach no more than 2 to 3 hours daily. Find out what works for your family and stick to it.

If you want to learn more how to set up a curriculum and educate your child, attend our 2020 homeschool webinar - bit.ly/homeschoolknox.com

If you are in Knoxville and have a male child between the ages of 5 and 10, please consider signing him up for our STEAMI Summer Institute - www.uunikacademy.org/event

Resources

Youtube (young children)

Khan Academy Kids

Kids Learning tube

AlphaBlocks

Story Bots

Tinga, Tinga

Bino & Fino

Books

Hey Black Child - Useni Perkins

Llama, Llama Book Series - Anna Dewdney

Little Stevie Wonder - Quincy Troupe, Lisa Cohen

Pete the Cat Series - James Dean

My Daddy Loves Me - Baba Sekou Afrika

Juneteenth For Maizie - Floyd Cooper

Freedom Over Me by Ashley Bryan

I Am Loved - Nikki Giovanni

and the Tag-Along Moon - Floyd Cooper

Hidden Figures - Margot Lee Shetterly, Laura Freemen

Sulwe - Lupita Nyong'o, Vashti Harrison

When The World Was Black (Vol 1 & 2) - Supreme Understanding

Autobiography of Malcolm X - Alex Haley

Black Boy - Richard Wright

Assata - Assata Shakur

Richest Man in Babylon - George Clason

Rich Dad, Poor Dad - Robert Kiyosaki

The Everything Kids' Money Book - Brette McWhorter Sember

(YouTube Pages)

Earn Your Leisure

Black Fathers Now

UUNIK Conversations

HomeTeam History

Khan Academy

Crashcourse

America Eats It's Young: When Does Violence Begin?

Thu, 23 Jan 2020 14:17:00 GMT

America eats it's young, when does violence begin?

Violence doesn't begin when a male pulls a trigger on another.

Violence begins when a male impregnants a female and tells her that he's not the father. He goes on to ignore his child as if the child wasn't his.

Violence begins when a female lies about who's the father of her child and allows another person to raise the child. And when the person raising the child doesn't want to deal with her anymore, the mother tells the unsuspecting child the truth.

Violence begins when a male infant witnesses his mother being raped or physically abused by her boyfriend or husband.

Violence begins when a child is born into a household where he is not nurtured, valued or given the affection that he needs. Oftentimes, this particular child has a father in his life.

Violence begins when a mother allows her sick boyfriend to sexually molest her male child, thus creating a sexual predator.

Violence begins when men in a family don't step up and nurture/train the fatherless males in the family.

Violence begins when a male infant is told in so many actions and words that he will not amount to anything by his parents as well as those who teach him.

Violence begins when a lawmaker creates laws targeting and entrapping poor black and brown people (i.e. Clinton's Three Strikes Law).

Violence begins when you put a massive amount of people in areas where there are food deserts, lack of resources, very few job opportunities, drug infested, and underfunded schools.

Violence begins when a male child enters school and thrown in 'special education'; not because he's slow, but because he can't read at grade level and no one has the patience to assist him.

Violence begins when a male child watches hours upon hours of images of violence and bloodshed via video games and TV.

Violence begins when a child is not taught how to respect human life at an early age. He hears others talk about it, but he rarely sees it displayed via action.

Violence begins when a male child hears his mother talk about his dad in a negative light. And anytime the child misbehaves, he hears that he's just like his 'no good daddy'.

Violence begins when a male child is brought up to worship material goods and that his self-worth is intrinsically tied into having 'nice' stuff (shoes, clothes, electronic gadgets, jewelry, etc.).

Violence begins when a male child is brought up to view his female counterparts as sexual objects. Also, when a male child is taught that its normal to refer to his female counterpart as 'bitches', 'hoes', 'THOTs', 'gold diggers', etc.

Violence begins when a society fears black males and thinks that the only solution is incarceration or death. And when the same society trains Black males that they are worthless.

Violence begins when a group of people laugh at a male infant cursing or misbehaving. Instead of correcting the behavior, they (consciously or unconsciously) encourage the infant to continue to misbehave.

Violence begins when a female child is taught that her self-worth is tied to her physical appearance and that the only way to keep a man is what 'deeds' she does for him.

Violence begins when a male child is not taught his cultural heritage and what his real value is to his people.

Violence begins when a people allow their sons to be taught by others who (for the most part) see the sons as prison fodder.

Violence begins when a child is taught weekly that the image of his deity is not of his own, but that of his former slave master's.

Violence begins when a male child is taught by his parents and society that his only value is to excel athletically or entertain. And when he doesn't reach his goal, his world is shattered.

Violence begins when there are no alternative options for those male children who don't pursue higher education and don't have marketable skills to earn a living.

Violence begins when men as a whole don't see the need to help other children who are not their own. They think that their only concern is their household as if the world will not influence or affect the lives of their children.

Violence doesn't begin with males on the streets pulling triggers at innocent bystanders. Violence begins in the womb, in the schools and in the homes. And until we take corrective measures to help raise a village of men/women, violence will continue to affect us all.

Back to the Basics: Teaching Our Children How to Court and Date

Wed, 15 Jan 2020 14:20:00 GMT

And we must teach our youth and young adults how to listen and receive wise counsel. Too many of them don’t get the 'ract a pe' needed to assist them to make correct decisions. Too often, it goes in one ear and out the other because they don’t respect the person giving the advice or because of how the advice is given. e; however, those folks who are polar opposite usually don’t stay long. n is any different than the previous. And because we don’t change, we expect our children to select better. Until we understand that if we don't learn from our mistakes in our mate selection, our children will not. We are the model from which our children will replicate (good or bad).

In other words, we attract who and what we are. So if we want a young person who is loving, responsible, mature, self-sufficient, nurturing, and loyal, we must BE!!

We can't coninue to raise children who are immature, irresponsible, co-dependent, spoiled, and expect to him/her attract a person who is everything that I've listed in the previous sentence. Now this is not to imply that our children will not encounter people who are fundamentally the total opposite of who they are; however, those folks who are polar opposite usually don’t stay long.

And we must teach our youth and young adults how to listen and receive wise counsel. Too many of them don’t get the 'soul food' needed to assist them make correct decisions. Too often, it goes in one ear and out the other because they don’t respect the person giving the advice or because of how the advice is given.

Every potential mate of your child should be 'interviewed' by elders in the family (men and women). Now when I say elder, I’m talking about someone who’s over a certain age and possess a high moral code of living. And their thoughts should be heavily considered in the decision to enter into a serious relationship.

Too many young adults are making the same mistakes that their parents have made regarding relationships. And it’s having a devastating effect on our family structure.

Let's get to the best traditions of our past and recreate a generation of men and women who will be committed to loving each other and producing a generation of leaders!!!

The Proof is in the Pudding - A Parent's Testimony

Sun, 15 Dec 2019 14:23:00 GMT

Ms. Endia Williams' feelings regarding her son being enrolled in our STEAMI Summer Institute.

STEAMI Summer Institute is an annual program that occur during the months of June and July. It lasts 7 weeks and occurs daily (Monday through Friday) from 9 am to 3 pm. STEAMI (Science, Technology, Engineering, Arts, Math Initiative) introduces the targeted males to STEAM related learning and careers.

The objectives of the program are: to expose and inspire our youth to pursue careers in STEAM related professions; to implement educational activities that lead to each participant performing at or above grade level in the areas of reading comprehension, math, writing development and science; to develop effective leadership skills; and to foster a sense of self-accountability and teamwork.

Annually, we average 25 African-American male participants, ages ranging from 4 years to 10 years.

For more information, please email us at info@uunikacademy.org

Want To Create A Genius? Read a Book!!

Sat, 07 Dec 2019 14:29:00 GMT

Parents, please make sure that your young children read at least one book a month outside of what is required of school and write 15 minutes a day in a journal. I’m observing that many of our students (including those who earn good grades) are behind in terms of reading and comprehension. Just because your child attends a ‘good’ school doesn’t mean that he/she is being challenged academically. Many schools don’t teach critical thinking nor effective communication.

Don’t just do what’s required in school, go beyond. Collectively speaking, many of our children are not excelling academically . We can’t put all the blame or responsibility on schools/teachers. We, as parents, must understand that we are in charge of our children’s education. Many of us MUST do more to make reading and comprehension the #1 priority at home even to the point of removing any extracurricular activities that our children are involved in. Reading and comprehension is essential to our children's lives as adults. Whether its attending college or a trade school, our children have to read and comprehend at a certain level to excel. Whether its purchasing a home or car, our children to have the ability to read and comprehend contracts and written agreements; otherwise, they will be taken advantage of while losing alot of money. Like the old saying goes, 'Reading is Fundamental'.

Here's some practical steps to take to improve your child's reading ability:

Have your child read daily. The goal for younger children (5 to 9 years) is to read 2 or 3 short books a week. The goal for older ones (9 years and up) is to read at least to 2 chapter books a month. These books should be in addition to what is assigned at school.
When listening to your child reading, ask him/her to recite orally what was read.
Teach your child how to write an essay (start with sentences and a paragraph for young ones).
Invest in an tutor for your child. Don't allow your child to continue to struggle. Its ok to ask for help.
Allow your child (8 years and older) to create a daily journal which he/she writes in for 15 to 20 minutes.
Develop your child's speaking skills. Have them do oral reports regarding a book or a documentary/movie in front of the family.
Teach your child 5 new vocabulary words each week (outside of school assignments).
Teach your child how to effectivley engage in private and social outings. They have to learn how to use their voice to ask questions and effectively communicate their ideas. Too many of our children just sit in class or in a group and say very little. How do you know if your child is retaining information if he/she doesn’t open their mouth?

We must make some fundamental changes in how we approach our children’s education as it relates to literacy (i.e. reading and comprehension). Otherwise, we will continue to see more of our children struggle in life as adults.

For more information, please reach out to us at info@uunikacademy.org

#educationisourpassporttothefuture

#makeitpriority

#education

How to deal with spoiled teens?

Wed, 27 Nov 2019 14:32:00 GMT

Do you have spoiled teens who think you are a bank teller and not grateful for the sacrifices you provide? Are you tired of fussing and complaining about their behavior?

For Thanksgiving and Christmas, instead working your butt off to provide a big meal and gifts, drop them off at a local Salvation Army or the Love Kitchen (Knoxville) and make them volunteer n serve others. Let them spend a day there and then make them write an essay about their experiences.

A lot of our children need to be humbled and change their perspective on life.

In all honesty, our children don’t need a lot of gifts and overconsumption of meals. But they need to learn humility , to be more thoughtful, and need experiences that build character.

Our jobs is to rear productive men/women of character and work ethic, not spoiled grown males and females who heavily depend on you. Otherwise, you will be working the rest of your days taking care of them (and their unborn children).

Stop mortgaging your child's future via student loan debt

Wed, 20 Nov 2019 14:41:00 GMT

How to Prepare Your Toddler for Academic Excellence

Wed, 20 Nov 2019 14:39:00 GMT

Early Bird Catches The Worm

Parents! If you are planning for your child to excel academically and professionally, it’s extremely important to start preparing them EARLY! How early? Education starts once the child is in the womb. Recent scientific research suggests that fetuses can hear and feel sounds outside of his/her mother's womb. Fetuses can recognizes songs, sounds and languages that is frequently played or spoken in his/her environment.

The Sooner, The Better

Once the child is born, parents can begin implementing small daily tasks to increase the child's brain function. Daily tasks; singing nursery rhymes, reading a book, playing with building blocks and showing sight word flash cards, can make a big impact on your child's educational success long term. Even if your child can't speak, he/she is learning what is introduce to him/her. I would also suggest not to 'baby talk' with a child. The sooner a child is introduce to proper English (or whatever your native tongue is), the better he/she will be to learn, comprehend and master it.

Readers are Leaders

The sooner your child learns to read and comprehend, the better off he/she will be for the rest of his/her academic and professional career. You don't have to wait until your child attends pre-school or kindergarten to introduce him/her to certain academic skills. In fact, I encourage to develop your children at the faster pace than of his/her peers.

My wife and I started teaching my son before he was born. We read, converse and sang to him in the womb. When he was born, we held conversations and read to him daily. We introduced sight words with pictures before the age of 2. We created an environment conducing to learning. He's now 6 years of age, reading at a 3rd grade level. All it took was frequency, intensity and duration. Most academic activities took 15 minutes or less each day. Our babies are smarter and can learn quicker than what the experts think they can.

Tips for Parents of Toddlers & Elementary-Aged children

1 to 2 yrs old - Sing nursery rhymes as well as popular (clean) songs to your child daily. Have daily conversations with him/her. Talk to them daily ('no baby talk'). Show pictures of your family and teach your children the names of aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins. Allow your child to play with blocks. Read to your child daily. Walk them around the house and teach them how to identify household items. Limit the time that they are on a tablet or watching TV. Time Period - 15 minutes daily (5 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes in the afternoon and 5 minutes in the early evening)
2 to 3 yrs old - Introduce the alphabets (alphabet song) and numbers (1 thru 10) to him/her. Start developing your child's phonetic skills (ability to sound out words) by sounding out the letters in the alphabets. Teach how to identify basic shapes and colors. Read to your child daily. Begin teaching your picture sight words (via flashcards), 5 words weekly. Allow your child to get comfortable holding a pencil.
Time Period - 20 minutes daily (10 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes in the afternoon and 5 minutes in the early evening)
3 to 5 yrs old - Continue to develop your child's phonetic skills by having him/her sound out vowels, consonants, diagraph and consonant blends. Continue to teach your child how to count (1 to 20) and master sounding out the alphabets. Begin teaching him/her 25 to 50 sight words (i.e. and, the, of, but, have, etc.). Teach your child how to write with a pencil (purchase a primary handwriting tablet). Purchase posters that have various colors, shapes, vegetables and fruits (go to a teacher's depot). Continue to read and have your child begin reading pre-k and kindergarten books daily.
Time Period - 20 minutes daily (10 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes in the afternoon and 5 minutes in the early evening)

By following these tips and make them a daily ritual, you will put your child ahead of his class in each grade level. Many of these tips can be performed 15 minutes daily. I'm a proponent of working ahead of what's considered the academic norm for a child. I often ask myself, 'Are you rearing an average student or a genius?' My answer is always a genius. Geniuses aren't just born, but are molded, shaped and developed. Geniuses work harder and smarter. And geniuses are usually ahead of the curb.

So the question you have to ask yourself, 'What are you rearing?'

For more information, email us at info@uunikacademy.org

The Power of 20

Mon, 16 Sep 2019 14:43:00 GMT

The Power of 20

20 minutes a day with your child engaging in an educational activity can develop a life of success and happiness for your offspring. Whether its reading a book, writing an essay or journal entry, solving math problems, developing his/her vocabulary, developing a science project, learning how to code, learning new ACT/SAT words, building bricks via legos, learning a foreign language or solving a crossword puzzle, 20 minutes a day engaging in a brain stimulating activity can result in the world’s next architect, scientist, professor, successful business person, lawyer, doctor, computer programmer, or healer.

20 minutes a day x 7 days a week x 52 weeks a year equals 7280 minutes a year. That’s over 121 hours of educational engagement annually. Imagine if a toddler (4 or 5 years of age) engage in this activity for the next 12 years, that’s over 1400 hours of educational engagement. That’s more than what the majority of your child’s peers will engage in over a 30 year span.

If your child is in middle school, 20 minutes a day can still push him/her to the next plateau. 20 minutes a day for a 6th grader will result in 7280 minutes a year of educational enrichment. By the time, he/she graduates high school, that number would be 43,680 minutes or 728 hours of educational engagement. That’s more than enough hours to prepare him/her for college/university life. It can result in a free ride to a university or it can result into to a successful stint in a technical or trade school.

20 minutes (or more) a day can bring out the academic giants that lay within all of our children. The opportunities in the world are vast, however, it will each one of us invest the time and energy to ensure that this becomes a reality for our children and/or grandchildren.

- Reggie Jenkins, Executive Director of UUNIK Academy